


My Daughter, My Child

by skylandmountain



Category: The X-Files RPF
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-12
Updated: 2017-12-16
Packaged: 2019-01-16 15:20:49
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 13,673
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12345321
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/skylandmountain/pseuds/skylandmountain
Summary: What leads Piper to delete her Instagram pics?





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Something straight out the trash can that as far as i know absolutely didn't happen apart from in the darkest recesses of my deluded mind.  
> Honestly, it's probably where it should stay.  
> ( there are a couple of mentions of 'Peter') it had to be done, sorry.

David could feel the tension between him and Gillian dripping from his pores.  
It wasn't just sexual tension it was everything.  
They'd agreed to be professional and do the best job they could for what is likely to be the last time they work together, but it wasn't working. He needed to talk to her like they used to, they always go through this hell of a filming schedule together, holding each other up when the days and nights of shooting are so long they can't function for exhaustion.  
Even though she's here beside him it's not the same, she shrugs him off as soon as the scene cuts, disappearing to her trailer. He misses her, misses their closeness, misses being inside her.  
After their last fiasco of trying to make it work they'd gone their separate ways, she'd got someone else now. Not that it seemed to be doing her much good she seemed moody as hell most days.  
He needs to be with her he can't bear this distance between them.

Gillian sat in her trailer, she hated this chasm between her and David. She wanted to be near him to laugh at his silly jokes, for him to put his arm around her shoulders and let her rest against his chest, keeping her warm while they stood for hours in the freezing cold to get one shot.  
She knows it has to be this way, she'd made a promise and being alone around David is enough to tug at the strings of that promise, fraying the edges wearing it down. 

When she had told Piper she'd agreed to another season of X Files she was surprised by her daughters reaction, she seemed wary and almost disappointed.  
She had broached the subject sometime later with just the two of them sitting at home eating chocolate and still trying to catch up with Breaking Bad. 

Piper was a strong and capable girl who didn't share her mothers talent for emotional meltdowns and usually had a good grip of everything so Gillian was surprised to see her daughters eyes well up with tears.  
Gillian had immediately put a protective arms around her and held her tight "what is it Piper?"  
She'd said stroking her hair "you can tell me anything sweetie you know that" she'd gently coaxed.  
Piper her face buried in her moms unruly blonde hair had told her she was scared that her mom was never going to be happy if she kept going back to The X Files and back to David.  
Piper had witnessed so many showdowns between her and David and the after effects it had on both of them, particularly her moms emotional state and she just wanted that to be over.  
Her mom was with someone now and it wasn't the most exciting relationship but it was stability for all of them. 

Gillian had immediately felt the guilt of Pipers revelation weigh heavy on her shoulders, she had exposed her daughter from a young age to the disaster that was her and David. 

Piper loved David she viewed him as a second father and everytime she had to say goodbye it had broken her little heart in two. As she got older she'd learnt to cope with those feelings, she knew the pattern of behaviour her mom and David followed, they'd fuck, screw things up, fuck again and leave, one of them would always leave muttering some half apology about it not working out again.

Sitting in her trailer Gillian runs over and over in her mind her promise to Piper.  
She'd held her close as she'd listened to her child tell her how she'd felt to see her mom so broken after another breakup and she vowed that this time would be different, there would be no David, no fucking, no screwing around messing with each others heads just work and then she would come home, back to her family and Peter and close the door on the last 24 years.

Gillian packs up her stuff for the day and heads out to her car shouting a general goodnight to everyone on her way out.  
She stops as she sees David, arms folded leaning back against her car door.  
"Hey" he offers tentatively testing the water.  
"What do you want David?" she sighs wearily.  
"To talk, to spend some time with you"  
She shakes her head " i can't" she says staring at the ground.  
"For fucks sake Gillian this is the last time we're ever gonna be here doing this, we've been part of each others lives forever and I can't even talk to you now"  
Gillian can feel tears stinging her eyes, she doesn't want to cry in front of him, she doesn't want to tell him she aches for him every single minute of everyday because then he will hold her in his arms and she will fall apart and her promise to Piper will be gone.  
"David please just let me go home, i can't do this anymore"  
David kicks the wheel of her car in anger and frustration but there's something about the tone of her voice a sadness that makes him want to hold her and never let her go but he steps aside and watches as she drives off without looking back.

Tears pour down her face as she drives "fuck you David, fuck you for making this so hard" she screams into the silence of her car. 

Pulling up on the drive her temples throbbing she rests her head against the steering wheel breathing in and out as she calms herself down. Piper is here with her working some days in the art department again and she can't see her like this not now not after everything.  
She grabs her stuff from the car, juggling her bags and scripts to find her keys, "Piper?" She shouts up the stairs "you home?"  
"Hey mom" Piper appears in the kitchen her hair wrapped in a towel. "You going out sweetie?" Gillian says kissing her daughter on the cheek "yeah a few of the crew are going into town they asked me to go for a few birthday drinks. Is that ok, do you mind?"  
"Of course I don't mind you go, enjoy a night out" Gillian says trying to avoid her daughters scrutinising gaze.  
"Mom, are you ok? You look like you've been crying" Piper says suddenly full of concern.  
Gillian forces a laugh "i'm fine honey, it's just a headache and i'm tired it's been a long day. Now go and finish getting ready i'm going to have a long soak in the bath and maybe just maybe I might do a little bit of birthday wrapping up" she says, playfully placing a butterfly kiss on her daughters nose. 

Gillian lies in the bath, closing her eyes she lets the warm water soothe her tight muscles and relieve her aching head. 

David is pacing his apartment, he can't get her out of his head. He isn't going to let her go after all these years, to just walk away from him as if nothing has gone before.  
He is gripped by a fear that had been growing in his mind for weeks, he realised he was terrified of losing her for good.  
Before there had always been the safety net of more X Files, more films, everytime they fucked and ended it they knew there was a next time, somewhere in the future she would be there, by his side, in his bed but now there was no promise of things to come, it was a finality he wasn't prepared for.

Gillian has changed into her black dress, the strappy one she wore when she agreed to sing with David at The Cutting Room. She smiles wryly remembering how she'd felt sick with nerves for a week before that appearance but as soon as she got on stage his presence made her feel better and she'd enjoyed being up there with him, he'd looked so happy to have her there and afterwards they'd spent the night together. They'd had slow seductive and sensual sex that night, exploring each other like they'd had all the time in the world.  
They'd stood on Davids balcony wrapped in each others arms the lights of the New York skyline illuminating their silhouettes and anything had felt possible.  
She sighs, that night seems so far away now.  
She puts the kettle on, spooning coffee into a mug then changes her mind and opts for herbal tea, she didn't need anymore stimulants, her mind was already in overdrive.  
Sitting at the kitchen table she spreads out the gifts she's bought for Piper. A gleaming new book by her favourite artist sits in the middle of the table. Gillian feels the smooth edge of the book, Piper had dropped a thousand hints about this book and Gillian was pleased it had arrived in perfect condition for her daughter. She sets the arty bag she's bought to house the presents to one side and starts cutting the wrapping paper.

The sound of gravel crunching on the driveway startles her, she knows the sound of his car. Her heart starts thumping out of her chest, why is he here? Why the fuck can't he just leave her alone.  
He's at the door shouting her name, she knows he'll make a scene if she doesn't open the door and she doesn't want that, she chose to live in this street while they filmed for it's seclusion and her anonymity.  
She wrenches the door open and his breath catches in his throat as he sees what she's wearing and he's speaking before she has chance to yell at him " Gillian I just want to talk, please I need to know that when all this is over i'll see you again i cant bear to not have you in my life. It's all ending and all I want is you, i can't handle the nothing Gillian please just let me in"  
Gillian signals for him to come in, she walks back to the kitchen "he is saying everything she has always wanted to hear. She never wanted to be just fuck buddies while they filmed, a distraction to the intensity of their work. She'd fallen in love with him and hated him in equal measure for the last 24 years but it was too late.  
David nods towards the kitchen table "Pipers birthday, I have a little something back home for her". He adores Piper, he's been in her life since the day she was born. 

Gillian thinks of Piper and tells him that whatever this is it can't happen. 

The ferocity of his anguish takes her by surprise. He sinks to the floor his head in his hands, he's left it too late he's lost her, tears slide through his fingers. She stands trembling in front of him, her whole body is crying out for his touch. He looks shattered and she can't take it anymore.  
She crouches beside him holding his head to her chest "it's ok it's ok David" she's kissing his lips her hands in his hair he lifts her onto the kitchen table, he pushes her dress up she tears at his jeans, ripping the buttons open, her lace panties abandoned on the floor.  
They fuck, it's hard and rough he bends her over the kitchen table and taking her from behind, she begs for more his tongue on her clit his cock in her mouth both of them emptying the weeks of frustration and denial into the other.  
" i love you Gillian" he whispers as they collapse to the floor a tempestuous tangled mess.

The sound of the front door closing jolts her back to reality she scrambles to her feet grabbing at her clothes but it's too late Piper is standing in the doorway.

She stares at the scene in front of her, she sees the book she knew her mom would get her battered on the floor, a casualty of her moms betrayal. It's too much, she turns to run but Gillian grabs her arm " Piper please i'm sorry this is not what you think it is"  
Piper spins round "what is it then mom" she looks down at her half naked disheveled mother and at David "because it looks like the same old shit storm from here" she yells.  
" I didn't know you were coming home, i didn't know this was going to happen" Gillian pleads.  
"but you let it happen again" Piper says defeated. " I called you mom because I wanted to make sure you were ok, I was going to come back and spend the evening with you, i was worried when you didn't answer" She's angry now, shouting " you didn't answer because you were fucking screwing each other on top of my birthday presents"  
"Do you even care mom, you're meant to be in a relationship, what about Oscar and Felix, are they just more pawns in your game. They know Peter now you've let him into their lives and you're going to do to them what you've done to me all my life. You promised mom you promised" her voice cracks with emotion and tears spill down her cheeks.  
Gillian can't speak her insides are churning, in that moment she sees Piper as her little girl crying at the trailer window as David walked away after yet another row. She need to speak, she should say something but her words won't come out.  
David finally realises what's going on, why Gillian had kept her distance, she was protecting her daughter from this, from him and the torrid saga that's been their life.

"Piper" he starts "this is my fault"

"I don't care, i don't care anymore David, you can both do what you like. I'm done with it all.  
This isn't my life mom it's yours" she says picking up her mobile she deletes the photos of her mom and The X Files from her phone and walks out.

Gillian buckles as the door closes, David is by her side holding her up "it will be ok" he says pulling her towards him, she turns to face him spitting her words "this is your fault, you made this happen. I've lost my daughter, my child for a fuck with you. Do you understand what that means David do you?" She's lost all control now she's pushing him in the chest "get out just get the fuck out" "fuck you then Gillian" he shouts as she slams the door behind him. She blindly stumbles to the front room she needs to find her phone she has to call Piper. Picking up her phone she sees the voicemail flashing, the message Piper had left her. Sitting down, her hands shaking she listens to her message. Her daughters sweet voice fills her senses " hey mom just ringing to see if you're ok, i think i'm gonna call it a night and come home spend the rest of the evening with you. I love you mom."  
She calls Pipers phone over and over but it's switched off.

Gillian curls up in the foetal position on the couch, tears running down her face.

David drives, he doesn't know where but he's driven through the fading light of day and into the night. He stops at the end of a dirt track slamming his palms down on the steering wheel. He's angry but not with her, this is his fault. 

He spins the car round, he needs to go to her, she'll be broken by this, he has to make it right.

Gillian doesn't know what time it is, but it's dark and she's cold, she's shaking with shock and cold but she can't move.

It takes him what feels like hours to find his way back, he feels sick as he pulls up outside.  
The house is in darkness, he tries the door it's still unlocked, he walks quietly through the hallway and up the stairs assuming she's gone to bed, putting on the light outside her bedroom he pushes open the door whispering her name. He can see immediately she's not there.  
He runs down the stairs calling her name putting on all the lights momentarily afraid of what he might find he lets out a breath when he sees her shivering on the couch.  
"Gillian thank god" he whispers reaching out and touching her arm, shit, her skin is like ice.  
He picks her up carrying her upstairs "you're freezing baby you need to get warm" he says softly. Her whole body is convulsing with shivers, how long had she been lying there he wonders, the stark contrast of their earlier lust and him now gently undressing her isn't lost on him.  
Finding her pyjamas he pulls the shirt over her head and wriggles the pants up her leg. He tugs at his jumper, removing it and putting it on top of her pyjama shirt. He pushes lightly on her shoulders laying her down on the bed, he tucks the comforter around her and slides into bed beside her. He wraps his arms around her  
"i promise i'll fix this baby, i'll make it right" he says lacing his fingers through hers as she stares into the blackness of the night.


	2. Chapter 2

David his limbs heavy, fighting their way out of the grasp of sleep reaches out to Gillian.  
A cold empty space jolts him awake. She's not in bed next to him, a place she should have been every night for the last twenty four years he thinks.  
Getting out of bed he goes to the window, he doesn't know why he checks the presence of her car he knows it's not there, she's not in the house. All he hears is silence.  
David goes down to the kitchen, he's looking for something, a warm kettle a used mug, just some clue as to what time she left or where she might have gone but there's nothing.  
Everything is exactly as it was last night.  
He calls her mobile, it goes straight to voicemail. He tries three times and then a fourth. He doesn't know what to do.  
His eyes settle on Piper's book lying crumpled on the floor, a symbol of everything they've fucked up. He picks it up smoothing out the pages, he wants to make it alright , fix the damage, erase what's already written on the pages of his and Gillian's book. What if there are no more pages and this is where it ends.  
Fear grips at his heart, he'd kept her safe he'd put her to bed so why isn't she here, bile rising in his throat his hand sweeps across the kitchen table, the sound of shattering china pierces the air as he sinks to the floor "fuck you Gillian, where are you" he covers his face sobbing into the flesh of his palms.

Gillian is sitting outside an apartment, the fifth one she'd driven to since 4am. Piper's car isn't here just as it wasn't at the other four.  
Her knuckles are white as she hangs onto the steering wheel unable to let go, it's the only thing keeping her from collapsing.  
She lets out a wail and tears spill down her already raw skin. She's been everywhere she is familiar with, places she knows Piper goes and she's not anywhere.  
Her stomach heaves, she wrenches the car door open retching onto the parking lot but there's nothing to throw up she hasn't even had a drink since she got home yesterday. She thinks back to the herbal tea she made and the presents she intended to wrap, the sobs rising in her throat threaten to choke her.  
She doesn't know how long she's been sitting there when she remembers David, he's called her, he's worried. Of course he is she thinks, he'll be going out of his mind not knowing where she is. She's been selfish thinking only of her own distress, she picks up her phone she needs to call him let him know she's ok " fuck fuck fuck" she yells as she sees the blank screen, she hadn't charged her phone and now it was totally flat.  
She starts the car cursing her stupidity, she needs to get home, start to put things right properly she thinks as everything goes black.

David has spent three hours pacing the house, he's called her again and again but her phone doesn't even ring. He doesn't know what to do. Should he call Piper, he doesn't want to drag her any further into this mess or worry her unnecessarily but she would want to know her mother was missing wouldn't she. He even considered calling Peter, his number was staring at him, mocking him from it's place on the fridge written in Gillians neat handwriting and stuck down with a magnet. Why the fuck is it there why hasn't she just put it in her phone, is it there as back up incase she loses her phone or as a reminder not to fuck her co star.  
He's jolted out of his torment by his phone ringing he snatches it up it's her, "Gillian" he says relief flooding his voice.  
"I'm sorry sir this is Vancouver City Hospital" David can't see, everything is spinning, he grips the edge of the table " where is she, where's Gillian?" he yells into his phone.  
"Sir, Mr Duchovny, she's ok, we have her in a private wing of the hospital. We think she fainted while she was driving. Luckily she was only just pulling out of a parking lot so the damage is minimal but she has a cut and a bump to her head. We would like to keep her in overnight but she's insisting on going home and she's been asking for you".  
David can't speak, in those brief seconds the nurse was talking he thought he'd lost her.  
"I'm on my way, please tell her i'm on my way" he utters, his voice cracked with emotion. 

Gillian is lying in a hospital bed, she's wired up to a blood pressure monitor and she's got a drip in the back of her hand, when they brought her in she was dehydrated.  
After checking her over and charging her phone enough for them to call David they'd given her some tea and toast and told her she had to stay in until they were satisfied she wasn't showing any severe signs of concussion. They said she was lucky, save for a headache and a few bumps and bruises there was no damage done.

David runs down the hospital corridors searching the rooms, finding a nurses station he stops but his words come out too fast he's making no sense but they know why he's there.  
A nurse guides him to a room at the end of a corridor "she's in here" she speaks kindly, in hushed tones but as David puts his hand onto the door handle she stops him "Mr Duchovny, i'm sorry this is awkward and of course everything is one hundred per cent confidential but is there any chance that this wasn't an accident?" Her words catch in David's throat, echoes of his own fears. "it's just that when they brought her in she still had her pyjamas on"  
David rubs his hand over his eyes. What the fuck does he say? The same thoughts had been eating him up the whole way here.  
"We have someone here she can talk to, you know if things are a little too much for her right now"  
David exhales slowly, considering his words. "Thank you, that won't be necessary, things have been a little rough recently but this would have been an accident, he pauses before adding i'm sure of that"

Pushing open the door he sees her, she looks so fragile, pale with the darkest circles under her eyes. He just wants to fold her into his arms and hold her there forever.  
Her eyelids flutter open and she sees the pain and fear etched on David's face. She reaches for his hand. "I'm sorry, i'm so sorry David" tears are silently rolling down her cheeks " i tried to call you but my battery was flat, i was trying to get back to you that's what I remember and then there was just a nothingness"  
"Sshhh sweetie it's ok" he soothes. "Where were you when it happened? What were you doing?  
"Looking for Piper" she falters, emotion breaking her voice "i thought i could find her"  
David smoothes the hair from her face, gently tracing the angry looking bump on her forehead and kissing the graze on her cheek. "She'll come back honey, i promise she will come back"

Gillian is lying on the couch, the hospital had reluctantly agreed to discharge her providing she stayed calm, rested and had someone with her for twenty four hours. David had dragged the comforter and pillows off the bed and brought them to the couch just as she likes it.  
He made her something to eat and watched her while she slept. He was pleased she was too exhausted to put up any resistance to sleep.  
As he sat watching Gillian sleep he thought about Piper. He had to find a way of putting this right. He crept out of the room and took his phone from his pocket. He was surprised when this time Piper answered " Hi" she says flatly.  
Taken aback to hear her voice David hesitates. "What is it David?" she asks a slight inflection of annoyance in her voice. "Sorry Piper, i didn't expect you to answer"  
"Well you obviously want something because you keep calling" she says acidly " so what is it, did my mom tell you to call?"  
"No she didn't, i called because I love your mom and right now she's really hurting and I want to make it better for her. I also love you Piper and I want to know you're ok and to ask you to please come home"  
"I'm not coming home David" she says bluntly, "but I do need some of my things, i'll meet you and listen to what you have to say if you can bring some of my stuff with you"  
David knows it's blackmail but he has no choice, he has to speak to her, get her to understand and heal the rift with her mother. They'd both agreed to keep the accident to themselves, Gillian didn't want Piper to know what she'd done and even though David thought it would bring Piper back home he'd agreed they wouldn't tell her.  
"Ok, text me what you need and i'll meet you tomorrow" just tell me where and when and i'll be there" he says hoping she doesn't insist on seeing him today, he can't leave Gillian today.  
"Ok, don't bring my mom" she says and hangs up.  
David takes a deep breath this was going to be harder than he thought.

Gillian is awake when he goes to check on her. "Who were you talking to" she yawns, stretching her arms out in front of her.  
"Brad" he says crossing his fingers behind his back, he hates lying to her but he can't risk her getting upset again.  
"Oh" she says still half asleep, she yawns again. " I think I might go and have a bath"  
"Ok sweetheart, but leave the door open, don't have it too hot and i'll be in to check on you"  
Gillian smiles, for all the angst they've gone through over the years there is nobody in the world who can make her feel as cherished as David does. When they have it right they are so perfect, why then she thinks do they get it so wrong, why have they never been able to make this work. 

She really should call Peter, tell him about the accident but she can't face a difficult conversation today, not with so much unresolved here.

Out of the bath and in fresh pyjamas Gillian pads downstairs and into the kitchen where David is spooning pasta onto two plates. "I'm guessing a coffee is out of the question"  
"You guessed right, no caffeine until tomorrow" he says filling her a glass of water and putting the plates on the table.  
"you get pasta, water and then a herbal tea if you're lucky" he says winking at her.  
Gillian sits down and spears the pasta with her fork. "What am I going to do about work and this?" she points to the bump and grazes on her face. How the hell are we going to work around this?"  
"Don't worry you're off for three days now, i think it will have faded by then and if it hasn't i'll talk to Chris, you don't need to worry about that.  
Gillian is silent staring down at her plate, it's true she is off for a few days, she was going to take Piper away. They were talking about visiting a part of Vancouver they hadn't been to before.  
She can feel tears stinging her eyes, she'd checked her phone continually since waking up earlier and it's silence was killing her. She wanted her daughter, she wanted to hold her child in her arms and for everything to be ok.  
David puts his hand on top of hers "it will be ok"he says rubbing his thumb over the back of her hand.

After they've eaten Gillian lies across David's lap, she's tired and her head hurts.  
"Are you sure you're ok sweetie?" David was worried, she looked pale again. The hospital was rignt, she needed to stay calm and not get upset. She was ok until she got worked up over Piper.  
"I'm ok, my head is hurting a little but i'm sure i'll be fine after i've slept again"  
David gets up and finds her painkillers, " i think you should take some more and go to bed"  
She doesn't protest, they are both shattered after the last twenty four hours and they fall in to bed in an exhausted haze. David waits until Gillian is asleep before he allows himself to close his eyes, before he does he watches her sleeping, he's doesn't want to close his eyes because then he can't see her and if nothing else this mess has confirmed what he had told her last night that he is deeply in love with her and he won't let her go, not this time.

When David wakes he is instantly relieved to feel the warmth of Gillian's body against his. She's still lying across his chest, he can feel her heart beating against his. He reaches down and entangles his fingers in her hair.  
He doesn't mean to wake her but she stirs under his touch "morning" she mumbles sleep weighing her down.  
"Morning sweetie, how are you feeling? Any headache?"  
Gillian shakes her head " no i feel fine" she says sounding a lot brighter than she did yesterday. "Do i get to have coffee this morning?"  
David laughs " yes you can have your coffee, you seem so much better, you just stay in bed and relax i'll bring you some breakfast"  
She smiles, she does feel better and she's positive that today she will see Piper and they will be as they were before but she will be with David and this time it will be forever.

After breakfast Gillian showers and washes her hair, letting her blonde curls hang loosely around her shoulders she applies a bare minimum of make up and goes downstairs to David. 

"I have to go out today" he says " i need to pick up some clean clothes and stuff from my place, will you be ok?"  
"I can come with you" she offers, she doesn't really want to be alone.  
David flounders " no honey you need to stay here and rest again it will be too much.  
He's slightly panicked, she can't come with him he needs to be be alone to speak to Piper.  
While she was in the shower he'd gone into Pipers room and collected the belongings she'd requested, he'd stuffed them into a big sports bag he'd found under her bed and he'd hidden them in the boot of his car. 

Gillian looks at the birthday presents that sit unwrapped on the kitchen side, "i think i'll wrap Piper's presents while you're out" she says trying to sound bright but a sadness gripped her insides. She'd always been with Piper on her birthday and Piper with her they'd never missed a year, wherever they were in the world they made the journey to be with one another.  
What if this year it doesn't happen that she's driven her away.  
She feels David's hand on her shoulder " you ok?" he says gently.  
She nods fearful of speaking lest her emotions betrayed her.  
He kisses her on the top of her head " i'll see you later, i'll be a few hours, i'll pick up some groceries too. If you need anything call me and don't do anything you shouldn't be doing just chill out on the couch and have a sleep"  
"Ok ok i won't misbehave" she jokes as she settles at the table to wrap the presents.  
"Oh and no more coffee this morning" he shouts as he closes the front door.

Gillian wraps all Piper's presents apart from the book, it seems somehow wrong to give her something that had so much unhappiness stamped upon it. That book held so much promise for Piper and now it is spoilt.

 

Gillian is exhausted again after wrapping up, the doctor really wasn't kidding when she'd said concussion can zap your energy. She curls up on the couch intent on taking a short nap when her phone rings. ' please be Piper' she thinks looking down at her caller id, it isnt Piper it's her PR team.  
"Hi Gillian, how you doing?" The voice is tentative, nervous even.  
"I'm ok" Gillian is equally on edge now,. "What's this about?" she asks.  
Look Gillian I don't know what's going on but i'm sending you over an article from a well known tabloid printed today, you need to read it now.

Gillian scans through her emails until she sees one from her team.

Her face looks out at her underneath the heading 'Gillian Anderson crashes car after drink driving" there's a picture of her being helped out of the car. She looks a mess, her pyjamas, her bloodied face.  
"What the fuck is this?" she shouts.  
" no " she shouts immediately regretting it as a sharp pain shoots through her head.  
" I wasn't drunk, how dare they fucking print this" she's still yelling.  
" i fainted, someone called an ambulance i was not drunk"  
"Why were you in your pyjamas"? Gillian is silent.  
"Come on Gillian we're going to need to put out a damage limitation statement for this. This isn't something that's just going to go away"  
Gillian starts to cry " i argued with Piper, i went to look for her, i was in a state i didn't think about getting dressed" she's shouting again, the pain in her head is agony. She fumb!es around looking for her pills.  
You need think about how you're going to address this. Think about what you want to do and call me back" 

Gillian feels like she's drowning, she can't get any air into her lungs.  
She clutches the side of her head as a searing pain crashes through her skull. She stumbles to the sink emptying her stomach contents.  
She can't think, what should she do.  
This could ruin eveything if Piper sees this and what about The X Files and her reputation, nobody will want to work with her again.  
Gillian picks up her phone, she needs David.  
"Hey" he says "missing me already?"  
"I need you to come back" she sobs "the accident is in the papers, they're saying i was drunk" she's practically hysterical now "i don't know what to do"  
The room is spinning, she can see bright flashing lights zig zagging across her eyes as another wave of pain stabs at her head.  
On the other end of the line David hears a crash followed by silence.


	3. Chapter 3

"Gillian, Gillian please answer me" David shouts into his phone. He hangs up, fingers shaking missing the keys he dials 911, they ask him questions he can't remember the answers he's forgotten where she lives. The operator calms him down, he breathes gulping down air, recovering himself.  
Then he's driving, he's driving too fast running red lights but he doesn't care. He cares only about Gillian, he needs to get to her.

He pulls up outside the house as the paramedics are taking her out, she's strapped to a stretcher her blonde hair dangling down the sides just like it does when she sleeps too close to the edge of the bed.   
"Gillian, Gillian" he leaps from the car "why isn't she answering me"   
He slams his palms onto the metal doors of the ambulance "shit" he runs his fingers through his hair in despair.   
A burly paramedic places a reassuring hand on his shoulder "please sir, calm down, take it down a notch. You're not going to do her any good like this"  
David momentarily closes his eyes and takes a deep breath, centering himself. "Sorry" he says with more eveness to his tone.   
"I thought she was.... he trails off a huge swathe of emotion constricts his throat stopping him from finishing his sentence.  
The paramedic meets his eyes " it's ok, we've given her something to keep her unconscious, she responded briefly when we found her but she was very distressed, she was trying to tell us something but her words were jumbled. It's better that we keep her sedated until we can get her to the hospital and find out what we're dealing with"  
"Will she be ok" David chokes.  
"She's had a head injury and they're difficult to predict, Her vital signs are good but I can't give unsubstantiated promises. We need to get her to the hospital now, it's the best place for her to be"  
"Can i ride in the back with her please" David implores. " I need her to know i'm here"   
"Sure, just talk to her like you normally would, there's every chance she can hear you"  
David settles beside her " it's ok baby, you're going to be fine" he whispers.   
He reaches out to touch her but his hand stops short of hers. He looks to the paramedic unsure if he should touch her. He nods his approval "go ahead"  
David takes her hand in his, it's cold, she doesn't like the cold. He wraps his hands around hers and rubs her tiny hand between his palms warming it up. Her hand belongs in his, it feels safe, it feels like home.

They arrive at the hospital, the paramedic asks David to wait in the relatives room while they take Gillian to resus to be assessed.   
"Oh before you go we picked up her phone it was on the floor next to her. It kept ringing so I had to turn it off but i'm sure she'll want it when she's feeling better"  
"Thanks" David takes the phone and walks into the relatives room. Looking around he's glad to see he's alone. He couldn't bear to make small talk with stangers who are terrified like him, their fear reflecting in his eyes.  
He looks down at Gillian's phone and it's cracked screen makes him smile, he remembers her doing this and the string of expletives that followed. Why the hell hasn't she got a new one. Typical Gillian he thinks.  
He should really turn her phone on, deal with her calls but he can't face that right now.   
He stuffs it back in his pocket and starts pacing the room.   
Why are they taking so long, he wants to know what's happening.   
His fists are balled into angry knots as he thinks about the person who took that photo, they are the reason she is here having god knows what done to her.   
He thinks about the times he's seen her cry over vile insults and accusations that she says she doesn't care about as he brushes away her tears. Her hard exterior doesn't fool him, he knows how soft she is beneath her armour. He wants to fight away everything that hurts her, never more so than today.  
Finally the doctor appears in the doorway breaking his thoughts. It's the same doctor who treated Gillian after the accident.  
"Is she ok? Is she awake?"  
"No, not yet we needed to do some initial tests first but we're going to try to bring her round now"  
"Do you know what's wrong with her?"  
The doctor nods "i think so, she appears to have experienced a type of migraine that can occur after a bump to the head. It can cause temporary paralysis through the body and it causes intense pain inside the head. It's likely she experienced some auditory disturbance, flashing lights and zigzag patterns. Piecing together what the paramedics have told us it appears she'd tried to get to her pills but dropped them and she'd vomited probably due to the pain which fits with my findings"  
"So it's not serious?" David is already exhaling his relief.  
"Well not serious as such but she will need careful monitoring in here for a few days, she needs to stay calm, if she starts to get distressed we will have to sedate her. Do you know what she was doing when she collapsed?"  
"She was talking to me on the phone, she was upset"   
The doctor raises an eyebrow " the newspaper article?"   
"you've seen it?"   
"I saw it on my way into work this morning" she purses her lips and shakes her head " it pisses me off there are people who make a living out of trying to derail others."  
"Tell me about it" David says wryly. "Look i dont suppose there's anything you can do to counteract the allegations, release a statement or something confirming she wasn't drunk"  
The doctor shrugs and gives an apologetic smile " i'm sorry that's really not my department but i know it would be highly unusual for the press office to comment"  
"Please" David is desperate to put this to bed before Gillian is exposed to any more trauma.   
"Ok I'll talk to the press office but don't get your hopes up, the press officer is notoriously difficult to negotiate with. Now if you're ready, we'll go and wake up Ms Anderson, i think it would really help if you were to talk to her, help to bring her round"  
"Of course" David follows the doctor to Gillians room.  
As soon as he sees her his eyes pool with tears, she looks so small, swamped by the machines she's wired up to.   
Seeing his emotion the doctor places a hand on his arm "she's ok, all of this was a precaution we just had to make sure. We're going to take all of that away now and slowly reduce her sedation. Just talk to her, reassure her, that's the best medicine you can give her right now. Don't' be alarmed if she doesn't remember why she's here, it may take a few hours for her to piece together the events of the last few days.She's likely to be very tired and a little confused. Once she starts to remember we may need to give her a sedative. It's important she remains as calm as possible."  
David pulls up a chair next to the bed and gently smoothes Gillians hair "it's time to wake up now baby" he whispers into her ear "come on sweetie, i miss you come back to me now"   
Gillian's eyelids flutter open she turns her head, her eyes searching for the face to match the voice .   
"David" she murmers sleepily "the lights are too bright"   
David leans down and kisses her softly on her lips "i'm sorry about the lights baby" he smiles, his sense of relief is palpable, she sounds sleepy and fuzzy, just like she does when she's taking a nap and he has to wake her to start filming again.  
"where am i?" Gillian asks suddenly aware of her unfamiliar surroundings. "You're in the hospital honey, do you remember why you're here"?  
Gillian screws up her face with concentration " no" she says finally. "Am i sick?" She's suddenly scared, why is she here, why can't she remember.   
"It's ok, it's ok, you had a bump in the car and hurt your head you don't need to worry you're fine you just need to rest"   
David is relieved that so far she hasn't mentioned Piper or the press.   
She closes her eyes "tired" she mumbles. "It's ok, go to sleep sweetie, you'll feel better when you wake up. I need to make some phonecalls, you just rest" he says tracing her cheekbone with his fingertips.  
Her hand reaches down searching the bed covers for his "don't leave me David" she whispers.   
"I'm not going anywhere baby, I'll just be outside"  
"No i mean don't leave me forever" she trails off as sleep takes over.   
David swallows the lump in his throat she'd stopped asking him to stay a long time ago and when she started dating Peter he'd lost hope that one day she'd ask him again. He thinks of the times they both should have stayed and all the things they should have done differently.   
The last few days have shown him where he wants to be and finally he doesn't care where that is, he'll follow her to London if that's what she wants as long as he can wake up next to her in their home, make love to her in their bed he doesn't care he'll follow her anywhere.

David grabs a coffee at the vending machine and wanders out into the hospital grounds. Finding a bench in a quiet corner he switches on her phone and braces himself for the onslaught of messages. Her phone immediately comes to life, her Mom has called, she'd seen the article and was frantic with worry. Her PR team has called over and over, Chris has called and Peter, there's messages from Peter.   
David calls her mom, he tells her everything and reassures her Gillian is doing fine.  
He calls Chris, he gets his arse kicked for his part in this shambles. He expected that, he knows how tight the filming schedule is and it's impossible to work around Gillian being absent.   
Chris is livid, he's contacting their lawyers, he wants to find the person responsible for the photo.  
He calls her PR team, they are also instructing their lawyers and seem to be floundering about how to move the issue forwards.  
David turns her phone round and round in his hand he needs to call Peter but somehow he can't. He listens to his messages, it seems intrusive, a part of her life he shouldn't be witness to.  
He's annoyed and frustrated that Gillian hasn't called him back and then he's worried. Of course he's worried David thinks. He really should call and tell him where she is but he doesn't.  
He turns her phone off again.  
He takes out his own phone and switches it on, he turned it off in the ambulance and had forgotten to turn it on again.  
He sees Chris has called him too.   
His voicemail flashes, it's from Piper. "Fuck" he was meant to meet her hours ago. He listens to the message, she's angry, he can hear the disappointment dripping from her voice. She assumes he's too busy fucking her mom to turn up, that's what she says, followed by orders not to contact her again.  
David puts his head in his hands this is such a mess.   
He calls Piper, he has to tell her about her mum, she needs to know.   
David hits callback, someone answers but it's not Piper. The voice on the other end tells him Piper has gone away, the voice informs him she doesn't want to be contacted so she's left her phone behind. David doesn't believe that Piper would leave without taking her phone or without telling anyone where she was going. David doesn't mess around he makes it clear that if anyone speaks to her they are to tell her to call him immediately.

David goes back inside, rounding the corner to Gillian's room he's aware of a commotion. Gillian is shouting he pushes open the door to find a nurse and the doctor trying to stop her getting out of bed. 

The doctor is administering a clear liquid into the back of her hand. She turns to David " it's just a mild sedative, it will make her drowsy and calm her down, She's started to recall the events of the last few days, she's been asking for her daughter"

David takes her in his arms "hey, what's the matter, what's wrong baby?" 

Gillian starts to cry " Piper i want to see Piper" she clings to David " i remember what I did, I broke my promise to my daughter her book was on the floor, the crash, i wasn't drunk" she rambles, sobbing she sinks into the pillow her eyes closing. 

"I know, it's ok sweetheart. Piper is coming it's all going to be ok"" he soothes as she falls back into oblivion.

Immediately he regrets his words, what the fuck is he going to do when she wakes up and Piper isn't here. 

The doctor breaks into his thoughts "is her daughter coming?"  
David shakes his head "no" he says quietly "i'm sorry i've made it worse, i don't know what to do. I don't know where Piper is i've left messages"...... he trails off

The doctor nods "i see, do you think if she gets the messages she will come, it would really help her"

David answers honestly " i don't know" up until today he'd have said yes but after today Pipers anger had reached another level.

The doctor is kind "try not to worry, she'll sleep now for a while and we'll deal with the next stage when she wakes"  
"Oh" she says " i almost forgot. "There is a little bit of good news, it seems the press officer is an X Files fan and has been persuaded to issue a statement confirming there was no suspicion of alcohol. It will be brief and to the point but it's something"

"Thank you, thank you so much" David can't believe how grateful he is for a small victory. 

He looks at Gillian, she's sleeping peacefully. His heart swells, he loves her and nothing will change that.  
It's somehow gotten dark outside, another day is ending. Today has been hell and he's exhausted, he turns down the lights and puts his head down on the bed closing his eyes, the events of the day fly round in his head like dizzy bluebirds.  
As sleep pulls him down he's vaguely aware of the door opening and a voice not unfamiliar, a voice he's heard today is saying his name.  
"David?"  
In the half light he can make out unshaven figure in the doorway.  
"Peter?"


	4. Chapter 4

All of David's senses are suddenly alert, he jumps up from his chair and it scrapes across the hard floor of the hospital room.  
"Get out" he hisses pushing Peter towards the door. David can't let Gillian see him, she needs to stay calm.  
"Shit" he curses as Gillian stirs, disturbed by the noise.  
They both stand frozen in silence neither of them wanting to be responsible for waking her. She turns onto her side without opening her eyes and carries on sleeping. 

Both men escape into the now darkened corridor. David speaks first.  
"What are you doing here Peter?"  
"What am i doing here?" Peter repeats sarcasm rippling through his tone.  
"What the fuck do you think i'm doing here David?  
I want to know why the woman I love isn't taking my calls anymore. I want to know what the fuck this is all about?"  
Peter thrusts the newspaper he's holding into David's face, glancing down he sees the picture of Gillian in her pyjamas, her face bloodied.  
So do you know what I did David? I got on a plane and i turned up at her house to be told by a neighbour she'd been taken off in an ambulance, so I come looking for her only to find you sitting by her bedside holding her hand.  
Peter is angry, he can't stop venting his fury at David, he knows something has happened between him and Gillian, he can feel David's guilt hanging in the air, a dirty little secret except it's not a secret, it never has been.  
David can't think, all his nerve endings are jangling, he's still stuck on Peters first sentence.  
One small sentence, but he said he loved her. David had never really considered that someone else would love her, not like he does but here is the man she's been dating, the one whose number is on her fridge standing there telling him just that. In that moment he feels strangely sorry for Peter, they're fleeting kindred spirits he's here to fight for what he was fighting for when he turned up on her doorstep, when he'd cried on her kitchen floor. 

Peter can see David is rattled "we're moving in together, she's sold her house" he throws into the ring. 

David clenches his fists, he hasn't lost his anger from earlier in the day and Peter's presence is igniting a frightening rage inside of him.  
He wants to punch him, to tell him how he'd fucked Gillian and how she'd clung to him and asked him not to leave her, but he doesn't. He won't because he has too much respect for Gillian, he won't fight over her, but he will fight for her. He can't lose her not now. 

David grits his teeth and gestures towards the end of the corridor " look there's a 24 hour cafe over the other side of the street from here, let's get a coffee and i'll explain everything"  
Peter nods curtly and watches David as he opens the door to Gillian's room to check she's still sleeping and then ask the nurse to call him if she wakes up. 

It's awkward, they both sit uncomfortably staring at the steam rising from their mugs.  
David shifts in his seat and starts to speak, he explains that Gillian and Piper had a row and Gillian was upset and tired, she hadn't eaten and she'd just simply fainted and bumped her head in the accident, then the tabloids had printed the photo and accompanying article and she'd collapsed after getting distressed.  
Peter nods but he doesn't speak. He knows he's only being told a half truth, he's been to the house, more specifically the bedroom. Gillian had given him a key when she'd left, that's how confident she was she wouldn't screw David this time. What he'd seen at the house told him that confidence hadn't lasted.  
The ruffled sheets on both sides of the bed, a laptop on the nightstand that wasn't Gillian's and various male t.shirts mixed with her lace knickers littered the bedroom floor. Peter had looked at the mess, Gillian was tidy she didn't leave things lying around. This summed up what he already knew, when she was with David she was chaotic and it wasn't good for her. Peter is brought back to reality by David's phone ringing. "Ok i'll be right there" he says suddenly standing and pulling on his jacket. "What is it?" Peter asks. "I have to go she's awake, i need to be with her" "and so do i" Peter says his jaw setting with determination. David puts his hand on Peter's arm, "no, not now Peter" David pauses, "please, if you truly care for her then don't let her see you tonight she's not strong enough yet" Peter hesitates. David seizes his chance "i'll call you, i promise i will call tomorrow, if she's up to it i'll tell her you're here" Peter nods admitting defeat. He doesn't just care for her he loves her and he doesn't want to cause her any distress. David heads towards the door and both men spill out into the blackness of the night, they part, neither looking back. "David?" He's reached the other side of the road when Peter's voice stops him. "Did you sleep with her?" David turns around and faces Peter from the other side of the street. "Yes" he says and turns away, walking quickly towards the hospital leaving Peter staring after him. David leans against the hospital wall, "shit" he rasps under his breath slapping his palm on the rough brickwork. He could handle the notion of Peter when he was thousands of miles away, he could pretend he didn't exist but having him here and confronting him was uncomfortable. It was forcing him to face up to the fact that Gillian had a life away from him, she'd moved on. He was so sure it didn't mean anything that he'd dismissed it from his mind but now he wasn't sure. "Hi, you ok?" David looks up to see Gillians doctor standing in front of him. He nods "yeah yeah i'm good, it's just a lot you know, the last few days have been tough" The doctor places a hand on Davids arm " i know" she says kindly " but she's doing a lot better now since she had some sleep, her blood pressure is normal and her heart rate has slowed back down" "That's great" David is relieved, all he wants is for Gillian to be ok. "Look i need to tell her a couple of things, i'm not sure how she's going to handle them" he says cautiously. "do you think she's up to it?" "Yes i think so, we're going to keep her on a very mild sedative for a little while longer anyway so that should help but she seems to be feeling stronger now, just tread carefully if you can. Oh by the way that press release will go out in the morning so that should help" David smiles "thanks doc that's great news" "Pleasure, and get some sleep yourself you look worse than i do after a double shift in the ED" David laughs running his hands over his stubble, he can only imagine the circles under his eyes are getting darker by the minute, he feels exhausted. "Hey sleepyhead how you feeling?" David is pleased to see her looking brighter with a little colour in her cheeks again, the sleep had obviously done her some good. "Better" she says reaching for his hand. " where did you go?" "Just to get a coffee" he lies, he doesn't know if he should tell her Peter is here yet. " mmmm coffee" she says " do you think I can get some?" David laughs " this isn't Starbucks you know and no I don't think you'll be having coffee today honey it's late you should be sleeping, we both should be sleeping. "I'm not tired now, I need to sort things out" David shakes his head "no you don't, you need to sleep and we'll worry about that tomorrow" "Did you speak to Piper?" David swallows, he's not ready for this. Gillian senses his hesitance. "she's not coming is she?" David squeezes her hand "no sweetie not tonight" "When?" "I don't know" he answers honestly. "But it's her birthday the day after tomorrow and she needs to come home" David smoothes her hair "she will, trust me she will come home, you just relax and don't worry about Piper, she's fine" He doesn't know what he's saying, he doesn't know she's fine or that she'll come back but he's sure as hell going to do all he can to make it happen. "Gillian, i need to tell you something" David says deflecting the Piper conversation onto the next difficult subject. "What is it?" She says uninterested, her thoughts are still on Piper. "Peter is here" "What?" She sits up quickly "where?" "it's ok i asked him to go, i said i'd tell you he was here." "I should have called him, it's my fault, fuck this is a mess" she says putting her head in her hands. David gently removes her hands and cups her face with his hands. "I love you Gillian but if you want to be with Peter i won't make it difficult for you." Gillian leans towards him, her soft pink lips brushing against his as she kisses him, slowly and deeply. "I love you" she says melting into the dark pools of his eyes "but i can't play games anymore, it's too much for me, for us...." she trails off "I need to know this is it." David takes her hand in his " i can't promise i won't fuck up, i'm not perfect, we'll row again, i'll sulk and you'll throw a tantrum but this time it will be because i've left the toilet seat up not because one of us is walking out" Gillian's eyes widen as she stares at David. "what do you mean?" she whispers. She's scared she's read this wrong, that he's going to laugh and say he was joking but he's not joking, tears are running down his face. David kicks off his shoes and climbs onto the bed, he lies down next to her holding her in his arms as she brushes the tears from his cheeks. "This is it baby" he chokes "i want you and everything that comes along with you. I don't care which side of the atlantic i live as long as it's with you" Exhausted they lie together breathing in their closeness until they fall asleep tangled in each others arms. It's 2am when the doctor passes Gillians room and sees them sleeping. He shouldn't really be in there overnight but she's lying on his chest and his strong arms are wrapped tightly around her. They look like a little love story right there and she doesn't have the heart to wake them. She smiles, turns off the light and closes the door. David stretches and yawns, the morning light is streaming in through the window, he reaches down lacing his fingers through Gillians hair, she stirs under his touch "mmm morning" she says sleepily stretching her own limbs out. "Holy fuck" i'm stiff David says untangling his legs from hers. She giggles and rubs her hand over his thigh. "Not that kind of stiff" he laughs dipping down to kiss her, " i'm an old man my bones aren't what they used to be" "This is cosy" a voice interupts their laughter. "Peter" Gillian is rigid next to David " "What are you doing here Peter, i said i would call you" "I know and i don't want a fight, i just wanted to see Gillian" Gillian touches David's arm, "it's ok, i'm ok i need to speak to Peter alone, please" she adds. David nods and goes to kiss her stopping only when he realises the insensitivity of such an act in front of Peter. David paces the corridor, he doesn't want Peter to talk to her, what if she changes her mind, decides he's a safer bet and all of this is gone. He hardly recognises himself these last few days, he's always known he's been in love with Gillian but he's never felt the icy fingers of terror squeezing his heart like they are now. He didn't know until it was all about to be taken away just how afraid he was of losing her. Finally the door opens and Peter steps into his path. "Don't fuck this up, don't hurt her" is all he says as he turns and walks away. David wants to say something but he can't, whatever he said it would be futile and lame, a consolation prize that nobody wants. He says nothing but walks into Gillians room and closes the door. She's sitting up in bed hugging her knees. "You ok?" David asks sitting next to her on the bed. She nods "yeah, it just doesn't feel very good hurting someone. Peter is a good man and he didn't deserve me fucking his life around" David puts his arm around her and she rests her head on his shoulder. "He told me to be happy" David traces circles on her shoulder with his fingertips "then be happy baby, be happy with me" "What's going on in here then?" Gillian and David jump for the second time that morning as the doctor opens the door. "You two will get me shot, sleeping together in a hospital bed all night" she says shaking her head in mock outrage. "Sorry about that doc, i just crashed out" David smiles ruefully. "Anyway, i think you're fit to go home today" she says taking Gillians wrist and feeling her pulse. "I'll keep you until after lunch just to be sure then you're free to go as long as you stay calm and promise to take the chill out pills for a few days" Gillian nods and David answers for her "she'll take them i'll make sure of that" "Ok, i'll see you later to sort out your discharge papers then" Gillian yawns "sorry, i feel so tired still" "you will do don't worry about that it's normal, just sleep when you need to it really is the best thing" says the doctor as she retreats from the room. Gillian lies down, the soft pillows feel good, she's worn out already. "Why don't you sleep sweetie, i need to go home and take a shower and pick up some fresh clothes and check Brick is ok with the sitter. Then i'll come back and pick you up later" "Yeah sounds good" she murmers already half asleep "bring Brick back he's coming to stay to" "I will honey" he whispers as he bends to kiss her but she's already asleep. He stands for a moment just staring at her, she looks perfect but he knows she's still broken inside. He knows she aches to see Piper, and he has to fix that.

David calls a cab, he goes back to his apartment, showers, picks up some more clothes and gets another cab to Gillians.  
His car is still parked awkwardly on the side of the road, the window on the drivers side down a litle. He'd been too distracted to remember to close it. 

David puts the key in the lock and is surprised to find the door already open.  
He carefully pushes open the front door, he pauses hearing a noise from upstairs. 

"Hello?" he calls out hearing footsteps coming out of the bedroom and towards the stairs.

"I'm calling the police" he shouts.

"Don't" Says Piper appearing at the top of the stairs. 

"Piper" David is relived he doesn't have to tackle a burglar and elated to see Piper back home. "I'm not staying David, i just need some of my things. I was hoping not to see anyone" "Anyone?" says David suddenly angry with Piper. "By anyone i'm guessing you mean your mom?" Piper shrugs and walks past David. "Your mom is in the hospital, didn't you not get my messages, haven't you seen the picture?" Piper pales, "no, what messages? What photo? I wanted to be on my own, I didn't have my phone" You're not making any sense David and why is she in the hospital is she ok?" "Yes, she's ok she'll hopefully be home later. Come and sit down Piper i need to explain" Piper chews her lip but remains unreadable as David recounts the events of the last few days. He tells her that they are committed to being together and things have changed. When he's finished Piper simply gets up and heads towards the front door. "Piper?" David cautions, unsure what she's going to do. "Look, i'm glad she's ok but i've got plans, i'm going back to London, back to my studies i need to do something for myself. Can you tell her for me David, please? Before David has the chance to answer, Piper is out of the door and a woman carrying a white box is coming towards them. "Delivery for Ms Anderson" says the woman to David who is staring blankly at her. "It's my birthday cake" Piper says quietly "mom does this every year" She turns and walks away leaving David holding the box and searching for the words to make her stay. Piper had parked her car away from the house, she rounds the corner out of sight of David and lets her tears flow. She desperately wants to see her mom, she can't bear the thought of her being hurt but she just couldn't bring herself to say yes. Piper wraps her arms around her chest hugging herself against the chill of the wind, she wishes she could feel her moms arms around her. It's late afternoon when David gets back to the hospital, he's cleaned up at Gillian's, changed the bed, put some washing on and picked up some groceries. He'd also spoken to Chris and given him an update and in turn he'd discovered the culprit responsible for the photo had been identified and now wasn't feeling quite as pleased with themselves after being hit with a lawsuit. Gillian is sitting in the chair dressed and ready to go when he walks in. The doctor had been round and given her the all clear a seven day course of mild sedatives to go home with. "Hey, you're looking brighter" he says kissing her. "I feel fine, just tired, i can't wait to get out of here though" she says snaking her arms around his waist. "Mmm you smell good" she says nuzzling into his neck. David grins, he'd put on her favourite scent which up until the last few weeks she always said was the smell of the person she loves and joked it should be called Eau De Duchovny. "Come on then honey, your carriage awaits, let's get you home" "Here let me do that" David says reaching for her bag that she picked up to chuck in the boot. "No it's ok i can manage" she says lifting it in. Shuffling some of David's things to one side she stops "that's Piper's bag, why have you got Piper's bag and that's her stuff in there" David is caught off guard, he has to tell her the truth now he can't pretend anymore. "I was going to meet her when you collapsed" Gillian's eyes narrow " without me?" "I had to, i was trying to get her to come home and the only way she would agree to talk to me was without you" "So where is she now?" David shakes his head " i don't know, she was at the house this morning collecting some of her things. She says she's going back to London" Gillian is shaking and David can see she's on the verge of tears. "She didn't want to see me?" she says quietly. "I'm sorry sweetheart and i'm sorry i didn't tell you i was planning to meet her. I just wanted her to come back to you" Gillian isn't sure if it's the pills or if it's because she loves this man standing in front of her but she isn't angry with him. She ducks her head under his arm and leans against his chest " i know baby" she says "thank you for trying" Gillian is quiet the whole way back. David doesn't press her to talk, he simply puts his hand on her knee and gives it a squeeze. She puts her hand on top of his and he drives one handedly all the way home as her delicate fingers curl around his. "Did you do this?" Gillian asks with delight as she spots various vases of flowers adorning window sills and tables. "I most certainly did" he says smiling, he's pleased with himself he knew she'd love them. "They're beautiful, thank you" "You're welcome. Gillian is startled by something small and furry nuzzling against her hand, "hey Brick" she laughs bending to stroke him. "Now do you want to go and lie down before i fix something to eat?" David says taking her bags and unpacking her washing. " i really want a shower, i smell of hospitals i just want to get clean and into some fresh pj's" "Ok honey, you go ahead and i'll sort dinner. Don't stay in there too long though or you'll get dizzy and i for one have seen enough of the inside of a hospital room to last a lifetime" Gillian laughs " me too"

David waits until Gillian is in the shower and under the water before he picks up his phone and calls Piper. She doesn't answer, he didn't expect her to but he leaves her a message. He lays himself bare, he tells Piper how much he loves her mom and how he'd fallen apart thinking he had missed his chance to have her in his life, he tells her he was a fool to have missed out on all the preceding years through fear of commitment and then rejection. He takes all the blame for Gillian breaking her promise and begs her to give them a chance.  
He hangs up, he's done all he can now. He just hopes Piper will understand.

"Hey" Gillian's voice shakes him back to the task in hand and dishing up something decent to eat.  
" Hey, i hope you're hungry it's almost ready" 

"Good, i'm starving" she says sitting down at the table. "hospital food isn't the best" David is pleased she wants to eat, so many times over the years when she's been stressed or upset he's has to coax her to eat. "This is really good" she says twirling spaghetti around her fork. It takes her a while but she finishes nearly all of her meal. " ok i'm done" she says setting her cutlery down on one side of her plate " " in that case go and sit down and i'll join you when i've cleared up" Gillian flops onto the couch followed by Brick. "Come on then boy" she says patting her lap "come and sit here" "Budge up Brick" David says as he appears from the kitchen " we've got a lot of Stranger Things to catch up on. They lie on the sofa together, Gillian tucked underneath David's arm.

Gillian makes it through one episode, David not even that. 

Looking up at David, she sees his handsome face shadowed by stubble and the dark rings around his eyes. She feels a pang of guilt, he's been run ragged looking after her these last few days.

She climbs onto his lap, straddling him, he stirs sleepily and pulls her towards him. Her mouth meets his and friction burns on their lips.

"come on" she says softly "let's go to bed"

They fall into a deep sleep entwined in one anothers arms.

"It's 3am when David is woken by Gillian screaming for Piper. 

David snaps on the light Gillian is sitting up in bed her knees pulled towards her.

Her whole body is shaking, tears rolling down her cheeks she feels like she's drowning, she claws at her neck struggling to breathe.

"Piper, I crashed the car, i killed Piper"

David is by her side " no, no you didn't it's ok, it was just a dream shhhh baby it's all ok" he says rocking her in his arms. 

"Come on honey calm down, breathe with me come on, that's it copy me in and out in and out"

Finally her breathing slow, she relaxes in his arms and they fall back into sleepy oblivion. 

David wakes to a familiar weight on his chest, her blonde hair tickles his bare skin as it tumbles around her shoulders. 

David wonders what the day will bring, she looks so peaceful he almost doesn't want her to wake up. He wishes that the day would just pass by and they could just skip to tomorrow, but he has to be prepared for Piper not to come today.

Gillian stirs and wraps her arms around David’s waist “mmm you’re so warm and comfortable” she murmurs. David rubs her back “mmm and you’re so cute when you wake up” Gillian kisses his bare chest and caresses his thighs. “Careful” he jokes “the doctor said no extra curricular activities for a few days” “Damn it” she laughs. Gillian stares at David, her blue eyes searching his face. "What?" he says taking her hand in his. "I don't know, i just feel different like things have changed for us we finally fit, my heart has found it's home" she says squeezing his hand. David leans over grazing her lips with soft kisses, "it always had a home, you just had to find the key" They both burst into peels of laughter "what's happened to us?" David says. "I don't know but i think you've found your next song lyrics" she jokes. He wraps her in his arms and they lie in easy silence for a few minutes. “You ok?” David asks gently. He has to get a handle on how she's really feeling this morning. “Do you remember last night?” Gillian nods “ it seemed so real” “I know sweetie” Gillian buries her face in his chest. “Alright honey it will be ok, try to stay calm it’s important you remember what the doctor said. He needs to distract her, stop her thinking about what day it is. “Come on lets get up, I’m making pancakes this morning and I can guarantee you won’t want to miss them”

"Is there chocolate involved in this culinary masterpiece?" she teases

"Of course, nutella and dark chilli chocolate spread all with your name on"

"Well what are we waiting for then" she says swinging her legs out of bed.

The pancakes didn't disappoint, still licking chocolate from her fingers Gillian crosses the kitchen to the coffee pot.  
She stops abrubtly when she sees the cake box all innocent and white, tucked into the corner of the worktop.  
She stands and stares at the box. Every year she opens it and manages to pick off a bit of chocolate from round the other side. She thinks Piper doesn't know but she does.

David stands in the doorway watching her. He doesn't say anything, he doesn't need to because he knows what she's thinking. He stands behind her, slides his arms around her waist and leans into her back., "It's ok, i'm ok David" she says quietly. "Good, because i've got a super lazy day planned. You, me, the couch and a Stranger Things binge." "Did you forget someone?" she says as Brick winds himself around their legs. "Come on Brick and you" David laughs. They spend most of the day just chilling on the sofa, they both fall asleep from time to time. David sees Gillian check her phone and he knows she's not really watching the tv, she stares at the screen but he can imagine what really plays over and over in her mind. As the day marches on she gets more restless, she paces the floor and looks out of the window, her hope of a reunion slipping through her grasp the later it gets. Piper's presents are neatly wrapped and waiting to be opened. She really thought she would come today, it's her birthday she has to come. Gillian repeats this in her head on a loop until she wears herself out and curls up on the couch. David is on edge, he is terrified she will make herself ill again. One minute she's ok, laughing and joking then she crashes back down. He makes her some tea and hands her one of her pills. "Honey i really think you need to take this" His goal is to get her through today, however it ends he's determined it won't be with with another hospital visit. Piper has been sitting in her car for over an hour, she's out of sight of the house but she wants to go in, she misses her mum so much. She knows life isn't simple and she wants her mum to be happy she really does but her and David are a risk a huge risk to themselves and those around them. For two so say sensible adults they have spent half their lives fucking things up. Piper shakes her head, trying to dislodge those thoughts, if she's going in she needs to go in with acceptance and forgiveness yet she's still rooted to the spot unable to move. Gillian has been dozing on the couch, she looks crushed and David's heart breaks for her. He's failed to make this ok and he has no idea where to go from here. Gillian's voice interrupts his thoughts. "i think i want to go to bed now i just want this day to be over" she says stiffly. David doesn't know what to say, no amount of distraction techniques can disguise the fact that Piper has let her birthday go by without making up with her mom. They are at the bottom of the stairs when they hear a key turning in the lock. Gillian spins round to see her small blonde daughter her face etched with worry standing in the doorway. "Piper" her voice is a whisper. Piper steps towards her mom and Gillian throws her arms around her. “Is it too late for cake?” Piper offers. Gillian meets David’s gaze over Pipers shoulders “ it’s never too late, it’s never too late for anything “


End file.
